Season Thirteen

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	1. "The Ring" Kenny and his new girlfriend go to a Jonas Brothers' concert. Thinking it's his way into her heart and other body parts, Kenny takes his new girlfriend to a Jonas Brothers concert. his dream of taking their relationship to the next level is crushed when the Jonas Brothers give them purity rings. Air Date: March 11th 2009
	2. "Who Is The Coon?,” “The Coon” rises from the trash and takes his place as a lone vigilante who wipes out crime in the town of South Park. A rival superhero appears on the scene in the form of “Mysterion” and challenges the Coon’s place as a “symbol” for the town. Air Date: March 18th 2009
	3. "Margaritaville” Randy steps forward with a solution to fix the desperate financial state everyone finds themselves in. The town gets behind him and everyone starts to live a life that no longer depends on any economy at all. Meanwhile an unlikely savior makes the ultimate sacrifice to solve everyone’s problems. Air Date: March 25th 2009
	4. "Eat, Pray, Queef,” Someone played an April Fools joke on the boys and it didn't go over well. Butters is incapacitated, Cartman is furious and the rest of the boys are afraid someone might do it again. Air Date: April 1st 2009
	5. "Fishsticks,” Cartman decides to help Jimmy with his comedy routine. Everyone loves the new joke they come up with. The joke starts to take off and it even hits all the late night talk shows. The boys are thrilled with how popular it’s become until somebody tries to take all the credit. Air Date: April 8th 2009
	6. "Pinewood Derby” Randy is determined that Stan will win this year's Pinewood derby. He comes up with a PLAN that will assure Stan a first place trophy. Air Date: April 15th 2009
	7. "Fatbeard" Cartman's dream of living the life of a pirate will come true if he can just get to Somalia. Air Date: April 22nd 2009
	8. "Dead Celebrities" The boys bring in professional ghost hunters to investigate evidence of paranormal activity in the Broflovski House. Powerful forces are tormenting Ike. He's freaked out and the stress could kill him. Kyle and the boys are doing everything they can to save him but the poltergeists won't leave Ike alone. Air Date: October 7th 2009
	9. "Butters’ Bottom Bitch" Butters has made it all the way to the 4th grade without ever kissing a girl. All of his friends have been teasing him mercilessly. Butters is determined to catch up with the rest of the boys in his class. Meanwhile, one overly dedicated cop wages war on prostitution in South Park. Air Date: October 14th 2009
	10. "W.T.F.," The boys have found their new calling in life and they hurry to sign up for the wrestling club. They soon find out THE KIND OF WRESTLING THEY TEACH AT SCHOOL IS not the same thing they saw at the WWE. The boy’s wrestling coach has the same problem. He’s been struggling for years to get people to see the difference. Air Date: October 21st 2009
	11. "Whale Whores" Stan and his family are spending his birthday at the Denver Aquarium where they will get to swim with the dolphins. Things turn bloody when the Japanese attack, kill all the dolphins and ruin Stan's big day. There seems to be no end to the senseless killing. Stan takes on the cause to save the dolphins from the Japanese. Air Date: October 28th 2009
	12. "The F Word" Everyone agrees they've had enough of the loud and obnoxious bikers that have arrived in south park. The boys are taking on the harley riders. They throw down the F word and the game is on. Air Date: November 4th 2009
	13. "Dances with Smurfs" Eric Cartman seizes the opportunity to become the voice of change at the school when he takes over the morning announcements. His target is South Park Elementary's Student Body President, Wendy Testaburger. Cartman is asking the tough questions and gaining followers. Air Date: November 11th 2009
	14. "Pee" Things at the water park are not what they seem. The boy’s fun filled day is about to turn deadly. Events are in play at Splash Town that signal the end of the world is upon us. Cartman tries to warn everyone but no one will listen. Disaster is about to strike and the boys are in a race to survive. Air Date: November 18th 2009